People in consensual non-monogamous (CNM) relationships may have different sexual motivations compared to their monogamous counterparts, a recent Journal of Sexual Medicine study reports.
In particular, people who engage in non-exclusive multipartner relationships could be more likely to have physical and goal-attainment reasons for having sex.
Consensual non-monogamy comes in many different forms depending on parameters set by the partners. For example, swinging allows for both partners of a couple to engage together in sexual relationships with others. Polyamory involves emotional or sexual relationships with individuals outside the couple.
Research on CNM relationships is limited. The present study focused on sexual satisfaction and sexual motives among participants in CNM and monogamous relationships.
The study involved 449 individuals (83 men, 357 women, and 9 people who identified as “other”). They ranged in age from 18 to 71, with an average age of 23 years.
The participants were classified in one of three ways. A non-exclusive single-partner group consisted of 40 participants who engaged in “non-exclusive relationships with one partner.” Eighty-seven participants made up a non-exclusive multipartner group; they had non-exclusive relationships with more than one partner. The third group included 322 monogamous individuals.
Each participant completed two assessments. The Why Humans Have Sex Scale (YSEX) focuses on sexual motivation in the context of four factors: physical, goal attainment, emotional, and insecurity. The New Scale for Sexual Satisfaction (NSSS) evaluates satisfaction with two subscales: ego-focused and partner/activity focused. Multipartner CNM participants completed the NSSS twice – once with a focus on their primary partner, and again with a focus on their main secondary partner.
After analyzing the data, the researchers found that non-exclusive multipartner individuals had more physical motivations than monogamous individuals did. “These participants reported being more motivated to have sex for experience-seeking and pleasure purposes than monogamous individuals,” the authors explained. Results for non-exclusive single-partner individuals appeared to fall in between those of the other two groups.
The researchers did not find any differences in sexual satisfaction among the groups. However, “sexual satisfaction was predicted by different types of motivations based on relationship configuration.”
“These findings contribute to a growing body of results demonstrating that CNM relationships do not result in less satisfaction than monogamous relationships, in contrast to what is commonly misperceived,” they wrote.
The results provide valuable insights for clinicians, especially those who are not accustomed to working with consensually non-monogamous patients. CNM relationships are often stigmatized, but considering individuals’ sexual motives and acknowledging differences between CNM and monogamous relationships may promote understanding among healthcare providers.
“Taking a blanket approach for treating men and women in different relationship configurations based on mononormative standards may not be the best practice,” the authors wrote.
They recommended that future research consider different types of CNM relationships and configurations, such as swingers or V-structured relationships. They also suggested clearer definitions of “dating” and the addition of more people with different sexual orientations.
Resources
The Journal of Sexual Medicine
Mitchell, Virginia E., MS, et al.
“Sexual Motivation and Satisfaction Among Consensually Non-Monogamous and Monogamous Individuals”
(Full-text article in press. Published online: March 20, 2020)
https://www.jsm.jsexmed.org/article/S1743-6095(20)30122-3/fulltext